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Bill Corbett / Cooperative Kids: Posted on Wednesday, October 26, 2011 5:21 PM
 I read with interest, Love and Logic’s Jedd Hafer’s entry in
this week’s newsletter to parents in regards to handling sibling rivalry. The
one thing that he stated that I agree with is that the argument belongs to
the children, not the parents. I even
support his position that the adult caregivers should state the obvious to the
kids by saying, “It sounds like you guys are having a problem (getting along)
and it will be interesting to see how you solve it.” But where Mr. Hafer has it wrong in my
opinion, is in his suggestion for what to do if the kids don’t solve it quickly
and the parents have to get involved. |
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Posted on Monday, October 24, 2011 4:10 PM
Settling Children’s Nighttime Fears
When my first
child came along and I didn’t know any better, I made the fatal “dad mistake”
when it came to helping her battle the monsters in her bedroom. Unwittingly, I
would frequently grab a baseball bat and head into her room in hopes of
quelling her cries for help by standing ready to battle the imaginary monsters.
As I lay on the floor swinging at those nonexistent creatures, I remember
shouting out in a Ray Romano like voice from the television show Everyone Loves
Raymond “there, I got all those mean monsters and now they are all gone. |
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Posted on Sunday, October 23, 2011 9:16 PM
When your child brings the report card home, begin by doing three important things during the encounter; allow your child to hold the card and read the grades to you, remain completely quiet during the reading, and listen with 100% of your attention. Once the reading is complete, do not pass judgment or invoke consequences or punishment. Your job as a parent is to ask open ended questions that will allow your child to make his own assessment (not yours) of his performance being reflected in the report card. |
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Posted on Thursday, October 13, 2011 8:45 AM
One Parenting
“Gimmick” to Avoid and What to do Instead
 The
following scene is all too common and one I’ve witnessed endless times. A toddler or preschooler is in the shopping
cart and she won’t sit down. Afraid the
child might fall out of the carriage, the parent orders her to sit down, but
the child ignores the parents demands.
Instantly, the parent “pulls out” a parenting gimmick she learned
recently and delivers the, “One…Two… ,” and those of us in the aisle wait with
baited breath for the final number THREE. |
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Posted on Wednesday, October 12, 2011 12:17 PM
In some families, the day the report card comes home can be an emotional time. If our parents handled this encounter ineffectively, with punishment, yelling, or even praise, then we too may struggle with how to manage it. Every parent longs to have their child bring home straight As on the report, but what if yours doesn't? Watch this NBC interview where I was asked for some suggestions on handling this teachable moment effectively. |
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Bill Corbett / Cooperative Kids: Posted on Tuesday, October 11, 2011 2:20 PM
According to expert pediatricians I have spoken to, biting usually occurs when one of two conditions are met; the victim or a caregiver over react to the biting, or the child is overwhelmed emotionally and he or she reverts to primitive behaviors to attack. Caregivers in charge should not yell, punish, or act out when the bite takes place. If they have to say anything, they can say, "Biting is NOT OK," in as calm a voice as possible. The victim should receive nurturing immediately and the play activity should then be ended. If possible, the biter should be removed from the play area and or at least from that playmate, and held lovingly by another caregiver. Parents and teachers normally get angry when they experience this occurrence, but they must realize that this is a normal stage for toddlers and some preschoolers. If the biting is a result of the child feeling overwhelmed emotionally, the caregiver should learn to recognized this state of the child and watch for triggers that ignites the biting. All biting does end if the caregivers in charge handle the incidents appropriately. In his book TOUCHPOINTS (1992, Perseus Books), T. Berry Brazelton, M.D. says, "If you lose control, too, you will frighten her and reinforce the behavior." |
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